Still Life with Baby Sized Blisters.

well I'm back. With an new found appreciation for Kandinski and Franz Mark, and the discovery of Balthus and Egon Shiele... and a new found taste for Klimt's semi-pornographic pencil sketches. And a suitcase full of art books. New York changed me man, and it's all down to the commentary of a certain anarchist-pacifist professor and his shared wisdom. That is definetly a place that I will visit often, money at this point has become a side note. I need to see art, even it requires pan handling on the subway on the way to the Met. Funny:people often lump New York with Paris as far as atmosphere and content. I could agree less. The people of Paris are actually cold and unfriendly, while in New York this is a myth. The only rude guy we saw was clearly nuts and sketching rappers in his giant notebook on the subway.

I have no idea how I am going to write a paper about local history at this point. I want to be a part of it, New York, New York

what controls the tide

The title was just in the saved memory, so I used it.

Today has been a long, but living long day. Went to bed late, woke up early, fixed the internet, ate an apple and chocolate bar, watched the lovebirds make bagels, eat them, dance, watch the snow fall numerous times, nothing ever sticking and talking a special german boy.
Now i'm just bored shitless and wondering... what is there to do next? I could clean.
...............OH MORTIMER GUESS WHAT. last night i got the most exciting text of my life, from k-town in l-town saying, while on her flight over the lands to nova scotia, there was a man on the plane. A man known as Mr. Joel Plaskett... guess who will have a signatune signature, (just joking, it's really just an plain old signature) in the mail, at her house? in the coming never specifide weeks? Moi hoi.
How's new york going? Did you take your phone? I can't remember if you did.
Either case, have some music you don't really enjoy, hope you brought all your hipster clothes.
I hear it's cold. BEST TIME TO SHOW IT OFF.

Bring it

One hour. That's all, and soon I will be on my way to the province's interior. I didn't expect to be doing this till next week, so it's a little bit of a shock. These are the things I'm looking forward to:

• wearing wool socks
• food in general
• not having to pay for anything
• coming back to a warm house
• wood stoves
• my family

And possibly the coolest thing of all: MY OLD DOGS WILL BE THERE!! Eric is bringing the whole crew up to race.

I hope The Big Apple is everything you hoped it would be, Ems. And I'll see you after Reading Break, Sarah. You should come over and meet my rabbit some time for a little bit of pre-bonding before the summer.

even if it is not true

I realize I should not be writing this. I should be writing my essay regarding the lost sense of community within the education system once it was formally institutionalized. However I am too jumpy at the moment. Also I am having doubts about the thesis statement now... and Laura wants me to make a broader statement regarding the state of education in Canada but how the crap can I do that in 5 pages, Laura? Either way Jordan (the prof) is gonna tilt his head back and look at me down his considerable schnoz and perhaps make an uninterested murmuring noise.

BUT.

at 5:00 pm ish tomorrow I will be cabbing it to the West Side YMCA with a bunch of like-minded if exhausted fellow art nerds. THIS is why I cannot properly write. Also I will internet-less for the nest week, which seems strange but I doubt I will even notice.

Hoi Hoi! Comtemporary Art

This is me trying to pack- I have been doing laps. I made my brother a birthday CD to waste time (his birthday is not for another two weeks) Weird thing though, every big trip I take is right before his birthday. Last time I was in Frankfurt international airport buying him souvenirs for places I didn't even go to. HA

Anyway I'm getting revved to see some Edward Hopper and some Gustave Klimt. If I die of happiness (or terrorist bombing) let it stand- you may divide my belongings among yourselves. I guess Shark can have what piddle money I have left to get some world traveling in... I know she wants to.

to hit the land!

Today was nice in the aspect of what my dinner was, just bread and tea.
Today was also nice in the aspect that b-town muller and I went for a nice walk, and got hit and surrounded by waves. We walked by through beacon hill park, freezing, because from head to toe, ice cubes were present and forming.

Tonight, I just went on a slight cleaning spritz and tomorrow I see my family. Thats another nice aspect. Mostly because I forever feel lost, and confused, and they are a wonderful base.

Pleasure spiked with Pain

Just wrote 800 words in under an hour. No need to applaud. Also wrote a postcard, a letter,three long emails, scattered in-class notes and one or two comments on Facebook. My little fingers are exhausted.

Laura I have both of those varieties of maps. You can have to one of the world, I plan on keeping my Canada one though. You may look at it if you wish.

Just watched 'Earth' by Deepa Mehta in my diasporic film class. That movie made me so tense I am still pulling yoga stretch moves to help my shoulders out. I cannot even believe this world we live in sometimes.

Had a meeting about New York today, can you say 4 days? Told two people where I was going, one of them gushed the other one looked down his nose at me and told me he marks student's papers in NY all the time, I should have no problem writing my paper. HA.

Also picked up a copy of the local undergraduate review this afternoon. Some of that prose made me gag. I hate to be a snob, but if I can't grasp what you mean in the first paragraph, I'm not going to make an effort. Also on the topic of being a snob: the painting at the top is by Emily Carr. She was born in a snowstorm in 1871 about 20 minutes walking from where I am sitting right now. She did the painting 3 years before she died, when she was making the craziest collapsed-foreground, chaotic swirl paintings. I guess she got sick of doing things like she was told to do things. Who can blame her?

We were sitting with our backs against the world, sayin' things that we thought would never hurt, oh who would have thought it would end up like this

Ohhh, The Script. How happy am I that I found your album in the bottom of a bargain bin for $2.99? Very, very happy.

This painting is by Gerardo Dottori. I don't know anything about him and this is basically an attempt to make myself look smart. But it's kinda cool, dontcha think?

Speaking of maps, I desperately need a small map of Canada and a larger map of the world, the first one for me to write all over and the second one for me to admire.

Prospects are looking good for this Yukon job. Here's hoping this coming summer is spent on the tundra under the Midnight Sun.

Quick Map of Israel.

Right now, that's just exactly what I am doing- drawing a quick map, for personal reference, of Israel. Just because i'm reading this cookbook, focusing on modern foods and cuisine in that lovely country (The foods of Israel Today, By Joan Nathan) and the book,is a cookbook, like I said, but also.. a story/history book, with alot of interviews and bits of cool and useful information and random paragraphs about it works over yonder.

It's cool though so far, a common theme in the first 20 pages has been just explaining that over the last 60 so years, the country it self, is new, but also, after ww2 and other problems, Jews from all over were flocking to their homeland, and there isn't really a consistent cuisine to say, of the sort.

Which is cool, I'm all into learning about a country discovering/re-discovering new bits of his or her self.

I also got a Lebanese and Turkish cookbook. Both look promising. Actually, in the Lebanese one, there was this milk pudding recipe, using rose and orange blossom water as flavorings, "Mouhallabia", and cardamom coffee, served sweet, and both just remind me of Montreal, and billeting, and sitting outside when it was sunny, enjoying the goodlife, either it be on the back porch, instantly remembering the typical back alley ways, or in the park, during lunch hour at work. Both good times. That week actually, while I was enjoying this, I also saw Corinne Bailey Rae. Shit man.

Could really use a chai right now

Didn't see my brother today, in fact have not seen him since... friday?

In class my prof made a comment about Van Gogh at MoMA and me and this other girl just sat there grinning our pants off. You realize its six days now? And I still have no way of getting to the airport that morning.

In other great and exciting news I am a little brain dead from staying out late last night. Went to the Men Over the Harbour's house and talked about oral sex, made waffles shaped like hearts and smothered in sauce au jack daniels et chocolat, fell asleep in front of Doctor Strangelove in a tangle of limbs on the couch. Nothing like atomic warfare to cap off a nice Valentine's Day. I wish I had been able to keep my eyes open though, everyone kept making fun of me for getting the plot mixed up. Apparently being a arts student has something to do with it. People don't seem to realize that History is a big part of Art History. So does language, literature, design, politics, philosophy, religion, anthropology, mythology, ideology, and masochism. Just sayin'

I have this extra free ticket to a Plants and Animals show on Saturday, which is awesome except I don't have anyone to bring with me. Also I'm not so fond of their newer album.

Turns out we have a castle to left of us, closer then you thought.

Its true though. The Castle is only like a good 15 minute walk away.
I'm freezing right now, my fingers are like ice.

he's not perfect he's my hero

I went to a club last night. This is not something I do often, believe you me. And so, trying to avoid eye contact with the boy who has his hands on my body, moving in slow circles in the sweet smoke machine liquor-sweat buzz of the underground dance floor, we danced. And I have to say right now I had a very good time. Mostly because I don't do it often and I was laughing at myself and everyone else there for most of it. Honestly if you forget about the creepy dudes wandering through the crowd looking for the girls wearing the least clothes, and you ignore how sticky the floor around the bar is and how devastatingly drunk most of the crowd is you can have a damn good time anywhere, I say. Met this guy with a really soft wool sweater from Norway, cock blocked this guy at least four times wh0 was trying to get at Jossy, went to a pretentious art show and laughed drunkenly at the bad poetry and paintings.

Either way, now I am a sticky mess and I have to try and get some things done. wish me luck getting out of bed

What is the story of how to disappear completely?

I'm listening to a radio documentary right now about a filmmaker who tried to make a film about his mother's death before she had passed away, but found it so shattering to always think about his mother dying that he couldn't do it, so he became a playwright instead. His mother was a single parent who worked two jobs and went back to school and got her PhD when she was 50, and taught at the same university for seven more years.

Sarah, I miss you. I wish I was baking bread. Unfortunately, I have a deep fear of cooking yeast, so you'd have to handle that part. Once the yeast is no longer in that creepy round creature-like state, everything's cool.

Applied to be an Au pair today. Mostly because, there could be some cool opportunity that could pop up, and also, just to see what i could get from it.

This lady also contacted me, after me posting an 'want' for an apprenticeship for an bakery, and she invited me to help her start up a baking aspect on her small organic farm. I way like, way too cool man.

I'm making bread right now, and my hands smell like yeast.
This week was my birthday, and I'm now 20 years old.
I got an architectural magazine from my friend Mortimer, with a note that is now sticking on the fridge. The Magazine is now under my pillow, but mostly because that just seemed like the most obvious spot to put it while i was cleaning up room today.

Not much more to say I guess. I've been thinking about mango chutney and I'm listening to this song that has " bow chicka" in the title. That is basically the sum of my night. Oh, and I can also hear the wind through the not-perfectly sealed windows.
Too bad blogspot doesn't have a drawing-in-blog tool, because if it did, I would be drawing you the wind right now.

All of Us Burn Out

Listening to Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs and planning out my day: gotta hit up the Art Gallery of Greater Victoria at around 1 (beg them to make me an intern) see the exhibition, take notes, come home and write an essay...Maybe go back to Walmart and explain that I am a huge idiot and therefore deserve my money back. I bought the wrong sized memory card for my camera. I was not even aware that they come in different sizes (feel free to yell at me about this, I'm almost getting used to the abuse)

Are you still alive Laura? Last I saw you were in great pain and eating free soup.

Man it's dark in here. I am trying to get through a 200 page book about the industrial decline of North America, except none of the information is going in. Normally 200 pages is a piece of cake but right now I want to beat my own brains in with a rusty hammer. The only thing that is keeping me going right now is New York City, in all of its glory, shining true at the back of my mind. Maybe I will put down the hammer.

Today I had a very hard time being anyone's friend. You may call me cranky pants. I got a camera in the mail except it didn't come with batteries so I have yet to know if it works. Keeping the fingers crossed.

Tompkins Park, Oh I'll be There Soon

There remains a hole in my ceiling directly above my bed, where the light fixture used to be. The plumbers came to fiddle with the hot water upstairs two days ago (Landlord assured me it would be like nobody had even been there... they were known for Taking Care of Business) and so now my room is lit by the very dim bulb of a 50 year old kitsch lamp.

Just pulled some orange blossom sugar cookies out of the oven, I swear to god this is turning into the year of baked goods. Made banana coconut cake with chocolate rootbeer icing for Shark's birthday yesterday. You can basically just throw an apron on me and tape my hand to a wooden spoon, looks like that's all I'm good for.

Also Shark and I decided, as of 30 minutes ago, ish, that if I ever come into a lot of money I'm going to open a prestiguous school for new ideas-like they used to do in the old days. It seems like anyone of particular different ideas or innovative taste would feel the need to open a school and spread it around a bit. I'm all for that. Tuition will hopefully be comparitively low, professors paid a competitive wage, the campus will be on Cloud Nine. I think it will be mostly arts based because that is what I know. Let me know if you would like to contribute to funding.

Gettin' crazy with the Cheeze Whiz

Yo. I'm exactly 162 words into an 800-word book review that's due tomorrow at midnight, and I should have started it at least a week ago. Why do I do this? And why am I further inconveniencing myself by typing up a blog post rather than another hundred words or so on the civil war? Schoolwork has just exploded lately, what with midterms and essays and all that fun stuff. Arghargharghargh.

Um. Yeah. Bad news on the sled-dogging front. I got a call this afternoon from Eric at Revelstoke Dogsledding Adventures. Since the media have been devouring that terrible story about sled dogs in Whistler, his bookings have fallen to zero. Which is not so great, since he has a tiny kennel of 16 older dogs and has really been trying to make a go of his operation. But it also means that he may have time to bring my old dogs up to the race at home, which means that I will have a reunion with my pals. And another friend of mine is running this huge 1000-mile race and his team has contracted a virus. Intense, huh?

Think of me while you guys are partyin' it up tonight. And on a Monday, no less.

Yours Sincerely

Well. Don't be surprised if I am swallowed head first into the computer screen. It will be like 'Honey I Shrunk the Kids' but a lot more realistic.

I have been spending the last two days (the last Entire Two Days) at this desk, with my fingers on the keyboard with my eyes unfocused. All in pursuit of higher education though right? Maybe if things go right I will not turn on my computer at all tomorrow. In fact that is the new goal.

I have to go memorize the name and dates of some artifacts. Sarah is in the living room watching Hot Fuzz with her flamenco guitarist beau. Somehow I thought he would have more refined taste than that.

(HI SALLY!)

Late night, but i smell nothing like david usher, sry bb.

The Hood Internet - Do You Want Crazy (The Dirty Diamonds x Two Door Cinema Club) by hoodinternet

The Drummer Looks Jolly

Even if this guy does seem a little agressive about the harmonizations... I think this song sums up what I want to do right now (any takers?)
Also the sky is steely snow grey right now.

Did she actually get to school on time?
here, ive been just hanging out and cleaning and feeding the rabbit next door left over bok choy, and just giving love to people in my life. I like being here, its a feeling of ultimate comfort. I think before, I don't think I've had the time to compare my feelings from being at home, to being away from home, because they were both at long periods of time. I don't know if that makes any sense, but still, it's something resonating in my mind right now. I made really nice biscuits to go with this soup tonight and while romancing on the internet between everything, i discovered you can make a chocolate cake with chickpeas. isn't that nuts?

Broadway Duchesse, Darling if You Only Knew Half the Things Everyone Thinks You Do

Just ate, upstairs neighbours are arguing. It's weird without you here Shark. I think you should come back asap.
My French prof put me on the spot again today. And he called me Emily, which is not my name. And being too flustered to correct him because I wasn't really sure what kind of an answer he wanted based on the vague airy fairy question. I was pissed, to be sure. It's weird, I think I have had one conversation so far today, besides basic hi/bye/how-are-yous and thumbs clicking pads on phones. After a day void of speech ones voice gets all weak and watery and you can't even thank the bus driver without sounding like a sad little bird. Sarah left at like 7, determined that she was going to walk to school. And she isn't back yet since her dad has taken her out for birthday pie. If everything goes according to plan I will be spendin my birthday this year in a tent in the Yukon. Sent in my cover letter today. and my resumé. It's funny that the word resume is French, but the French word for resume is latin (curriclum vitae). Actually I think the Brits say CV too?
Look at me on a rampage. Just finished one of the written assignments out of the ten I am behind on. I hate hate hate cummilative projects. I also hate everything except folk music right now. And this mashup of Blondie and the Arcade Fire from thehoodinternet.com. You should check it out, if you want to.

I'll Shine A Light on Your Home any day

Just checked my online banking and i have $0.00 in available funds. You think this is funny but it is not. Also Laura, not sure what you would call "alternative." If I had to put a label on things (besides Fine Young Lad) I would call Mr. Knight "alt folk" maybe. See for yourself.
I wanted to made tasty spinach egg noodles for lunch but I was too impatient and threw all the ingredients into the pot when the water was boiling. So now I am eating watery noodle soup. Tastes so right

And I took you home when you drunk too much

My rabbit had her foot stuck deep inside her ear and is now vigorously licking her toes. Gross. She got stuck behind the dresser yesterday and I was laughing too hard to help get her fat little body out of its predicament. So much for being a caring pet owner.

It's funny. After spending quite a bit of time at home (more than usual, anyway) and buying a few groceries, I feel tons better. The recent sunshine has helped a lot too, I think. Maybe it's true that having a concrete place to call your own helps ground you, makes you a happier person. Hmmm.

Yes, I would be interested in going to see Aiden Knight, as long as the tickets aren't astronomically expensive and as long as he isn't one of those fancy alternative artists. Ems, I also think that we should bite the bullet and talk to your "brother" one of these days. He could be madly in love with your flaming locks and we would never know because he's too shy to speak up. Whaddaya think o' that?

And can I just state, for the record n' all, that I plan on showing up for class tomorrow on time. No longer will I be That Girl.

Sarah, I hear that you also have a birthday coming up! This is exciting news! A celebration, yes?

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

I can hear the man who lives upstairs pee. I saw Aiden Knight walking down the street today and we made eye contact. It was while I was making a joke about the popo being after Laura.

You two feel like going to see him on the 18th?

I just overheard a conversation between my brother and my mom while on the phone. It went like this:

"Yes, Eric, that's dryer lint."

"What can you do with it? Well, if you rubbed it in petroleum jelly, it would make excellent fire starter."

"No, don't rub it on my face! My face is clean! I don't care if it's still warm!"

Hahahahahahahaha

No SIgn of that Friend of Mine

My Emily Carr prof used her cellphone for the first time in cass today to call technical support from downstairs. She got it at the end of last semester when this angry guy in the class slammed shit around and scared the pants offa everyone. So she makes the call today and everyone laughs when she says that that was the first time she had used her cell, no wonder she couldn't get the VDP to work.

Also my french prof, while trying to explain the fable of the Cigale et la Fourmis (ant and the grasshopper) to the class mistranslated 'cigale' as 'killer wasp.' I don't know if I was the only one in the class grinding my teeth.

There is this boy with red hair that we have taken to calling my brother- although he doesn't know it- I see him every morning and every afternoon on the bus. There is no one else in the city that I see everyday, like clockwork. It's funny, really. I wonder if he is aware of this. Maybe if I go missing off the face of the earth he will be the first one to notice.

More hijinks tomorrow.